Cousin Regulus

[alt_draco]

I hope that you're holding up all right, Mother. I told Father to send along my well-wishes, and I know that he will, but I also know that he's busy, so I figured that it would be fastest just to say something here.

It's stupid because it's all just too late now, but I wish I would have got to know him better. I could never tell if he was being serious or not, though, and even when I was little he always seemed to be teasing all the time so I figured he didn't like me children. Secretly, at least. So I never wanted to be around him all that much. Maybe that would have changed in time, though. I'd like to think that it would have.

I hope that you're all right too, Pansy.

Comments

[alt_percy]

Malfoy, I just got out of the Prefects' meeting, where I heard ... well.

Sincere condolences to you and your family.

Order Only

[alt_molly]

Oh--oh, Sirius. I am so dreadfully sorry...

Re: Order Only

[alt_bill]

Bloody hell. Mum, do you know anything more? Has Dad heard anything?

Re: Order Only

[alt_arthur]

No, I've not heard a thing.

Sirius, my boy, how dreadful. Please let us know when...when you discover this, and let us know if there is anything we can do.

Precious little though it might be.

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[alt_bill]

Right. I'll put the word out to the network to glean what I can. Carefully. Minerva, what were you told?

[alt_draco]

Thanks, Weasley.

[alt_narcissa]

Thank you, son. I am ... as well as can be expected, I suppose. Numb, I think, is the proper description.

It's not that it's surprising, really, but it's not the outcome any of us wanted. Your Nanella is understandably more upset about Auntie Walburga, but I do miss my cousin. However, I have been here before. Please, do Mother a favour and look out for Pansy over the next little while. I know she and Regulus had grown very close.

I wish you could have got to know him as well, son. He was insouciant, true, but he was ... kind. I think if you'd spent time with him you'd have seen that side.

Your Father says you looked fit. I'm glad. I miss you so terribly, but this is not the way I would have preferred a surprise visit.

Order Only

[alt_arthur]

Bill...sounds as thought you have to see what the network has heard about Mrs Black, too. Sirius, we'll pass on what we can, as soon as we know.

[alt_draco]

I've already written to Nanella, and I'm sorry about Auntie but since she was old it wasn't as shocking to hear that she was gone, I guess.. Father made it sound like she just couldn't take what had happened to Regulus.

I miss you too. I was just thinking that it seems like it's been almost a year since I last saw you, and then I realized that it has been almost a year.

[alt_narcissa]

Yes, she was - very upset. Most upset.

It is hard to believe it will have been so long. I shall have to bring a placard to King's Cross with your name so that we may recognise each other. Well, I hope you will recognise me; your Father says he thinks you've grown another three inches!

Will you be too old, I wonder, to want to spend any time with me at all this summer?

[alt_draco]

I think I look the same, but it's true that my robes are shorter.

Not too old just yet, Mother.

[alt_draco]

I just found something that you wrote in my journal a long time ago.

When people do not appreciate my kindness, that is when I stop extending it to them. I hope that you will not follow my lead.

Were you telling me I should be more like him? Kind, I mean.

[alt_narcissa]

Oh, my dear, I hardly remember. What was the context?

I think ... if you can balance kindness with strength of spirit, you would have the best of worlds. It doesn't do to be too generous, or people take advantage. It is, after all, necessary to be able to do what one must.

But it is also true that a little kindness can open doors that brute force cannot.

[alt_draco]

I was writing about my tea box and you said something about how it would be kind to share the tea. But I guess I didn't feel like sharing just then.

[alt_hydra]

A lot of people have died this year.
More than I've ever known.
I liked cousin Regulus, though, he used to save me his pudding, and he knew how to make tea just right.
I've never heard of someone dying of sadness, though.
Do you think that it happens a lot?

From,
Hydra

[alt_draco]

I don't know. It might happen a lot, but we just don't hear about it very often because it's depressing to think about. Who knows.

[alt_pansy]

thanks, Draco.

[alt_lucius]

How are you today?

[alt_pansy]

Lots of people at school are being sort of weird, like they don't really know what to say about it, and every now and then it just sort of hits me and it hurts all over and I have to go off somewhere and be alone for a little.

but Sally-Anne isn't being weird. She's been really nice about the whole thing. So is Ron. And Harry and Draco and Ne Longbottom and Hydra too. And that helps.

[alt_lucius]

Well, you have been there before, sadly. I'm not sure if this is worse for you, because you chose him as a correspondent, or whether it will fade more quickly, but that does not matter, at the moment. At least I am glad to see that you have been keeping on, which is the best response, I think, all things considered. Routine helps - I know it seems like everything ought to be able to stop, but lessons and homework and such at least require you to think about something else for spans of time, instead of dwelling on the loss.

Nonetheless, I have refreshed the Notificio on my journal so that if you write, I shall be alerted. If you need to talk, we may do so. Do not be concerned that you will be interrupting, Pansy: If I cannot write back right away, I shall reply as soon as I am able to do.

[alt_lucius]

Thank you, son.

We have both been very occupied, but as your mother has pointed out many times in the last two days, we are almost used to the routine by now. Not that anyone wishes the trend to continue!

I believe it's usually the case that most of us would wish to have known our loved ones better, and the more they were loved, the more they are missed. I take comfort from the fact that so far, your mother has seemed ... resigned. That is not to say that the floodgates will not open again, far from it. But I believe she has looked on the past two years as a gift she never expected to receive, having thought him lost already, so many years ago.

This has been a very difficult six months, nonetheless. Four members of the family, plus your Dennis - I mislike the average. I agree with your mother: We have had quite enough of this! But I believe that, although it is hard to lose Regulus, with his passing we will have seen the last of anxiety for a while to come. It is not an exaggeration to call his death a mixed blessing, since if nothing else, he is no longer in turmoil. We, however, are left to put together the pieces as well as can be determined.

It will be very good to bring you back for the funeral, however. I suspect your mother needs more than a little attention and comfort from us both.

[alt_draco]

I never really understood what he was in turmoil about. It seemed a bit spooky when he would go on talking about that stuff...

I'll be happy to give Mother some attention, though.

[alt_lucius]

Indeed, it was disturbing to many of us.

I fear soon the world will know more about it than any of us might have wished.

You might help your father and keep an eye on Pansy for me, will you? Over the remaining weeks of school. Particularly with the number of students who receive The Prophet, she may well see reports that will be difficult for her to accept.