Draco C. Malfoy

I think we might need some help here.

We weren't trying to rescue anyone, I swear, only we overheard the teachers say that Professor Lockhart should go out and try to kill the monster in the chamber since he's done so many heroic deeds and such, and then we tried to track him down because we'd learned from Granger that the monster was probably a basilisk and it was living in the pipes somewhere. We thought the information might help him kill the monster, you see. And Weasley was along because he thought it was his sister who was in danger, so he came along with us to Professor Lockhart's office. Only Professor Lockhart wasn't getting ready to fight a monster, he was packing all of his purple frocks into a trunk and getting ready to leave! And then he told us--well, it will take too long to write, but he's a complete fraud, that one, and he tried to ERASE Harry's memories but Harry was really quick and got his wand away from him!

So we had to find the chamber of secrets and make Professor Lockhart kill the monster, but he really didn't want to and he kept trying to escape, so Harry got his wand out and ordered him to get a move on! He was really angry. We found the chamber in the whinging ghost's bathroom, and it took Harry a long time to get it right but he finally said the right parseltongue words and the sink opened up and it was a deep passageway to a part of the castle I didn't even know existed. We were just trying to get Professor Lockhart to go down there and do what all the other teachers said he should do, but when we got to the bottom he snatched Weasley's wand and tried to erase our memories again! But Weasley's wand is rubbish and so the spell didn't work, and some rocks came crashing down and now me, Weasley, and Professor Lockhart are on one side of the rocks, and Harry is on the other. Harry shouted that he was all right and that he was going to have a look around on his own--I tried to tell him not too. But he hasn't said anything for a while now and we're trying to clear away the rocks but there's an awful lot of them, and Professor Lockhart has gone mental and thinks he's a student again and that we're all members of a spelunking club.

That was a learning experience, I suppose.

It's been decided that there really isn't enough time to plan my own party by the 23rd, so the party will be moved to 5 June of next year, my birthday. That will allow ample time to plan a utterly, epic and wiz-nift celebration. Meanwhile, those of you who received an invitation are all still invited to the Malfoy Christmas party on the 19th. There will be adults there, but the food is very posh and the entertainment is typically spectacular as well. Really, only the most important people get to go to that party, so you're all very lucky.

As you might now, my birthday is today, and my parents sent me a hamper of sweets and other nice foods from the Harrod's food halls. There's fancy cheeses with quince chutney and figs, truffles, chocolate marzipan, biscuits with grapefruit marmalade and strawberry conserve, macaroons, little pies with either venison, stilton and orange, or chicken, ham, and walnut. Oh, and turkish delight. I've not ever tasted grapefruit before, I don't think, so it must be really hard to get and expensive. And of course there's not very much it. But I want to share it with friends, and also to play the new game that Nanella sent me, Imploding Snap. I don't know what it does yet or how it's different from Exploding Snap, but I want to find out.

So if you're someone I consider a friend, you should come to my party tonight. It will start at eight tonight in the empty classroom where Pansy used to make people listen to music.

I went to the hospital wing last night and it was one of the worst things I've ever done. They listened to my breathing and said it sounded fine now but that if I had an allergy I would need to be tested. And I had to stay over night and Madam Pomfrey woke me up every half hour to drink a potion that had ingrediants I might be allergic to, and then I was to sit back and wait to see if the ingrediants made me change colour or cough or have a fit of some kind. So this went on until almost morning, and I wasn't allergic to wheat, eggs, shellfish, tree nuts, soy, milk, cat, or bees. I drank bees!

But I haven't an allergy to bees or any of the others. Which means that my father must be right and someone's been hexing me behind my back!

I don't know which if you is doing it, but you had better stop.